Hi guys. I know my blogs are about the day I tried to be in a rap video, and the day i spit on my own shirt because I was ODing on Jack Bauer, so I think it's time to class it up a bit so you guys don't think I'm (totally) gross.
So, this story all begins back in November 2011 at the classiest place ever Royal Albert Hall, oh have i mentioned that I played at Royal Albert Hall? Oh I have? Because that's my one huge accomplishment that I can't let go of or move on from? And I'm still suffering from post partum depresh from it? Ok, part A: my set included my song Ooh La la which some of you know has a (brilliant) lyric which goes: "Big Ben he must be running fast".
Part B: After the show, there was a little after party thing, where a man approached me and asked me about that particular lyric. I, being the ego maniac that I am, assumed he was pointing it out because it's a great lyric. Until he says, "Well, I can assure you that it's not running fast, because I'm the man that's in charge of it."
So in short, Paul works for the House of Parliament and fixes/maintains thousands of clocks, one of them being lil' ol' Big Ben. Well Paul and I ended up keeping touch and becoming pals. This past January, I went to London with my *intern, and this blog post is about Paul taking us to the top of the B squared. (Paul you should start referencing it to the Queen like that. Let me know what she says.)
First of all: my security pass photo. I don't think I can post it because I'm looking at it right now and it looks like I've been storing acorns in my cheeks. So no, I will not be posting it.
Secondly: The Stairs.
There were so many. You know that horrible feeling when you are trying to hide being winded so you don't seem like a fucking sloth? Well I was wayyy past that point. It quickly went from a polite:
-"oh my gosh these stairs!" to
-PAUL I'M GOING TO THROW UP and then finally
-PAUL I'M GOING TO DIE.
Then we got to the inside of the faces of the clock! This was one of my favorite things. Plus it was a rest from the stairs. Here's Paul and I.
So Big Ben is kind of run like a wind up toy. And that's what it looked like when Paul wound it up= easy. But he left it a little unwound so that intern and I could wind it up. AND GUESS WHAT IT'S NOT EASY AT ALL.
Here is intern winding.
Please look at Paul judging him a little bit inside his head.
And then here's me winding. At this point I think Paul was probably less judging my strength, and more concerned for my general health.
Ok so Paul was also telling us that in the past, they wanted to make the bell sound better so they made a bigger hammer, and it broke the bell. So of course I made a "it's not the size of the hammer" joke. Twice. No one laughed.
For the strike, you have to wear ear plugs. I was very preoccupied with getting mine in there, and didn't listen to about 5 minutes of interesting information Paul was giving us because I was irrationally scared of ear drum damage.
My top Big Ben story was that Paul once handed out ear plugs to a group of Swedes, and they took them out of the package and started chewing and eating them.
See? Just like a wind up toy.
I love this picture. Paul is hardcore and doesn't use ear plugs, and i made him take a picture with me while B Squared had it's 11:00 AM strike.
I could go on and on. It really was once in a lifetime. And all goes back to a simple (but brilliant) lyric. That's what I love so much. How music connects us. We had such a wonderful time, and last but not least is Paul looking like a rock star in front of his piece de resistance. I'm obsessed with this picture.
Anyways, to Paul, thank you so so so much for such an exciting day. You were a wonderful guide, you know so much! Not to mention this gives me some maj classy English street cred
OK guys, talk soon.
PS OK FINE I GIVE UP HERE YOU GO I SACRIFICE EVERYTHING FOR THIS BLOG.
*lover who helps me with things